Cheryl's Bloggin' Blog

The Art Impulse Returns

2012-02-24T10:52:00.000-08:00

I have been waiting for this moment…when my desire topaint is rekindled. While it is just a tingly beginning…I am certain it willcontinue to grow! I’ve especially wanted to revive my FACE Project so lastweekend when Dave and I drove to the Methow Valley to visit his oldest friend(not in age but time), I made sure to pack right: FACE # 1, 27, 28 and 39 madeit into my suitcase…the correct paintings for the exact players involved.


Dave (on far right) clutches the hand of friend Byron circa 1956. Sister Sandi in front

I originally painted Byron and his wife Wendy at their ranch inOctober 2010. Dave was my inaugural FACE while I am the Johnny-come-lately ofthe crew. Winter in the valley is breathtakingly beautiful and we had a freshsnow fall the first night. Before we left I had concocted several scenariosusing our FACEs and loved every bit of it! We even traded FACEs for a groupshot.

Dave has had his ups and downs in the several weekssince I have updated this blog….but then so have I. The both of us are on themend and we try to keep our chins up. Language continues to be a struggle yetprogress continues. The thing that marvels me the most is Dave’s terrificattitude and how he perseveres in the face of these rough events. Most peoplewould lose their temper more often or become a curmudgeon…not Dave! Withcourage he weathered last week’s low when the words issuing forth were nonsensethen suddenly this week things smoothed out and he could feel success andreward by actually saying what he meant!

One thing I have noticed the past couple weeks is thatDave has been logging onto Ebay, something he would often do pre-stroke but wasbeyond him until recently. He still cannot read emails but he can read just enoughalong with the visuals about comic books to keep him at the keyboard at least acouple times a day. This is encouraging!!! I am girding my loins for the pointhe progresses to bidding on comics again…sheesh! You would think he had enoughof them already????

We are working towards total independence. Should Inot be around to negotiate the pitfalls Dave needs to learn how to fend forhimself and I believe it won’t be too long. The trick is for me to send him outon his own more often, forcing him to learn to navigate the world without his“Speaking-Mouth Guide”. If anyone has the mouth for it I am your gal! I realizeI have been too protective of him at times but make no apologies for it. Timeto cut the ribbon!

We are finding ways to keep him occupied and have setup a table by the front window for puzzles. We also recently bought some modelsfor him to assemble, something he has wanted to do for years. We are lookinginto apps on an Ipad for Aphasics to help with his language skills that alsocan be entertaining. We watch Wheel of Fortune and Jeopardy and although hecannot follow it all I am amazed at what he can. I am hoping it won’t be longbefore he can listen to audio books and be able to follow the dialog. Right nowit is too much for him. We have learned to celebrate his progress inincrements.

I remind myself of how far he has come since September26^th, the date of his stroke. He has had to learn how to stand,walk, eat, dress himself, use and strengthen his right side and drive a car. Henow does these things with such alacrity that mostly one cannot tell hesuffered a stroke. He takes daily walks (much to Homer’s delight!) and has lost40 pounds. A good night’s sleep is still a challenge but it has improved.

He has also spent countless hours learning how to makecertain sounds and words then REPEAT, REPEAT, REPEAT, REPEAT, REPEAT!!!!!! ThenREPEAT some more. The challenge is making this stimulating and not tedious. Heis doing just FINE!!! There were even a few days not long ago that he was doingso well with his talking that I almost forgot he had Aphasia. We are told thatthese times will come more often as we continue to work and move forward in ourlife. We are settling in to a somewhat normal routine and feeling hopeful andgrateful!

Trudging Along

2012-01-19T17:10:00.000-08:00

The past couple of days we have been socked in withheavy snowfall. Our 4x4 truck has the ability to get us most anywherebut we’ve lent it to our son so he can get to work. Meanwhile we are content tostay at home and admire the rare beauty of a snowfall in Seattle. I am recently off my scooter andsporting a walking boot but a misplaced step on the ice could upend my plans ofrecovery so for once I am playing it on the cautious side. Is that gasping Ihear???? Yesssirreee! I am not being reckless!

Before Dave’s stroke neither one of us had even heardof “Aphasia”, which literally means ‘absence of speech’. Nearly one third ofall stroke victims suffer aphasia adding up to on million people in the USwith this condition. Yikes! And we had no idea??? Well we are starting to getone….

The experience of aphasia is different for each personranging from total disability in communication to being able to function insociety. For some people numbers and letters are alien-like squiggles. Otherscannot follow anything but the most simply spoken sentences in conjunction withgestures and visual aids. Still others think they are speaking correctly whenin fact complete nonsense spurts forth from their lips. Dave has experiencedparts of each of these in phases of his recovery but he is progressing verywell to the point that most of the time he knows when he has garbled or spokenthe wrong word.

Dave and I often devote multiple times daily to hisspeech therapy. The more we plug along on this path the more apparent it isthat Dave’s goal of being able to read may take years of working hard and eventhen there are no guarantees. As of now he can read words here and there butstringing them together in sentences and gaining context is beyond him. We workvery hard on the alphabet and he consistently repeats it correctly. As it turnsout this is his strength and we use it daily to rebuild his skills.

Right now we are working on the letters A, E, S, T,and P and simple “sight” words beginning with these letters that are taught toyoung children. We start with “What is this letter?” “What sound does it make?”and then try to have him recognize and pronounce words that start with theletter. Plenty of times it is arduous, tedious and frustrating...we spent over 2 weeks on the same 6 words and they still do not come naturally to him. Yet he does improve and when henails it we both reap the reward!

You wouldn’t think there was anything funny aboutaphasia but you are wrong! With all due respect to Dave and his valiant struggleswe have had some darn good chuckles when the word he meant to say is replacedby something else. I never laugh AT Dave (he usually doesn’t realize he hasspoken the wrong word until told). I always make sure to clue him in so we canlaugh together. Humor is the foundation of our life together and why shouldn’twe continue to get glee from the ironies of the situation?

Here are some of my favorite Davisms:

· When asked whatdoctor he had been to see he blithely replied “My gynecologist”.

· When telling about the “scallops and prawns”meal he ordered on Christmas Eve it cameout as “scallops and orgies”.

· It is not uncommonduring a home speech session that the wrong word is spoken or written but when he identified a roll of electrical tape as a TURD how can one not snicker?

· But my favoriteDav-ish incident came one night while playing cards with friends. I was on aroll and drawing the best cards when Dave muttered “You are so fat!” when hemeant “lucky” (at least I hope he did!). After informing him that he had calledme fat I decided that I too would become aphasic and turned to Dave’s partner(and my opponent) and declared “You are so stupid!”

There are so many things we are learning and coming toterms with. I know life will never be as it was before but we canstill have a fulfilling and complete life even if Dave never reads again. Themorning newspaper is a cherished ritual only I can enjoy for now. The dailycomics were a favorite of his and I have been saving them in a stack since hisstroke with the hope that he one day he will be able to take pleasure in themonce again. One thing is certain: we will never give up trying!

P.S. I am currently not on Facebook and it has been athorn in my side! Several days ago I was converting my page to Timeline andinstead it converted to a fan page and left me literally unable to post,comment or view the home page or any of my friend’s pages. I have spent hourstrying to solve it and FB has not helped one whit! My last choice was todeactivate my account and wait 2 weeks to re-open another one. That means Iwill have to completely rebuild my site and friendships but oh well….it is anew beginning in many respects! (if anyone has any suggestions please let meknow!!!!)

Pity Party

2012-01-07T15:37:00.000-08:00

The post below I wrote yesterday and decided to sit on the words a bit to see if I really wanted to publish them. Today I realized that I need to keep my entries as real as possible...no sugar coating! People that know me well know I shoot straight from the hip and I do not hold with tying reality up in pretty little bows or in sweeping life under the carpet. "It is was it is" and if I am to continue writing in this manner I will report our circumstances with respectful authenticity.

But I will preface this by saying today was a MUCH, MUCH better day than we have had all week. So here goes:

PITY PARTY

I have put much effort into keeping my blog entries asupbeat as possible. People want to hear things are going smoothly and Dave isimproving…and he is improving, however incremental it is, we just need toremind ourselves that it is improvement all the same. It also helps me to tryand look at things with a smile but when out-of-the-blue obstacles crop up andundermine my well laid plans I end up in a puddle of glum.

Not long after Dave’s stroke I was contacted by peoplewho had their own stories of long term care-giving and they offered me supportwith their kind words. There really is no recipe for handling life changingevents such as we have gone through…the only way is forward with chin held upas high as you are able. The tough part is keeping your chin up!

I have had plenty of talks with myself concerningattitude: “Cheryl, you have 2 choices….on one side is misery and the other isjoy. Now which one is more fun?” The answer is joy of course and I figure if Ican bend my mind in that direction it may not exactly hit “Joy” but itcertainly will stray from “Misery”. Most of the time this stiff talk slaps mein the face with a good dose of “get-over-it” but lately I have sincerelystruggled. The culprit is my weakened state due to foot surgery last week. I amnow in the position of needing the care.

Going into this surgery I understood the stakes but Ireally needed to get my foot taken care of so I could move forward in my lifealso. I actually welcomed this as the next step in Dave’s recovery. By allaccounts things should have been fine with his recent success and improvements.I thought, “How great his new independence will feel when the roles arereversed and he can benefit from being the care-taker rather than thereceiver!” Not that I require that much care…but not being able to put weighton my left foot for 2 weeks makes the simple things awkward and timeconsumptive.

The first few days went swell with Dave cookingdinner, doing laundry while I lazed about in a drug induced nirvana. Enter theunplanned perpetrators: first Dave broke a tooth and then he got sick. Not justa little ill but enough to have him slumbering on the couch for hours on end,drinking little and eating less. Pain and illness combined to slay his languageskills and his energy has been nil. Meanwhile I wheel myself around the housetrying to care for myself and him. This morning I broke down when it took me 3 timesas long as it should to change the bed sheets. Jorel discovered me with hunchedshoulders weeping with abandon. I was having my own little pity party and boywas I the life of the party! Or the death…depending upon your perspective.

I have a plethora of sayings posted on my studio walland the one I have reflected most upon the past 3 months states “Plan for theworst, Hope for the best, Take what comes.” The taking-what-comes part canleave a bitter taste in your mouth…and taking it with grace and a positivespirit is what I would aspire to but do not accomplish as well as I would like.

So many times when I find myself on the doorstep ofmisery I am blessed with a perspective that makes me realize that things arenot so tough. There are always people suffering so much greater than we are.Things are grim but not fatal. My situation is temporary and soon my scooterwill be in the rear view mirror. I must have faith as we plug along each daywith the formidable task of learning to talk, read and write that Dave’ssituation will also prove temporary. At that time I will be healed and ready tojump and tumble and dance in joy!

Holiday Hi-Jinx

2011-12-29T15:38:00.000-08:00

Son Jorel and Dave on Christmas morning

I do believe in miracles andlately Dave is proof positive they exist!

The turning point came in Texas...quite possibly it occurred at the Alamoon our first day there. At any rate he came home a different person than beforewe left.

The distances we walkedimproved his endurance, the museums we visited stimulated his reading skillsand the sheer amount of decisions we made each day on what to do andwhere to go improved his speech and comprehension skills. We both glimpsedfleeting moments of normalcy and Dave built an attitude of confidence not yetseen.

Traveling was great butcoming home is always a comfort. With just a week before Christmas it was thecraziest time for me. The reward was a Christmas much, much better than we evenhoped for! On the 24^th and 25th Dave had a huge break through withhis language skills. He fielded 2 phone calls from good friends and held hisown conversationally among a crowd of 23 on Christmas Day. It was so great tohear!!! It was the high pointsince his stroke. It continues to be up and down but it shows us what we canlook forward to.

Dave’s playful nature andmischievous wit has returned. On Christmas morning he and son Jorel got asurprise in their stocking from Santa and I asked them to pose donning theirgay apparel for me (see photo above). They are such good sports! It sparked agreat idea for next year’s Christmas cards….Oh I feel so sorry for my boyshaving to deal with me!

Dave is holding up muchbetter than I am during this period. The typical pressures of the seasoncoupled with my impending foot surgery tomorrow morning have combined to createa not so pretty Cheryl. Keeping a grip on my emotions has been a challenge thepast few weeks. I look forward to the days I will actually have time to get tothe gym and into my studio!! Dave probably does too……

But for now I will have tokeep working on that patience thing…sheesh! I guess I need that lesson for I amgoing under the knife again on my blasted foot injury from “H-E-Double HockeySticks”. I am ready to put this chapter in the rear view mirror! In preparationDave tells me he is ready to drive. This week he has been in training and Ihave to say I was less nervous the first time our son took the wheel. But Iwill encourage him with anything that will spur his independence! The nextcouple of weeks will be interesting...I will keep you posted and let you know ifwe will be in need of an intervention of some sort.

Traveling Man

2011-12-13T08:29:00.000-08:00

We are in Texas at themoment…San Antonioto be exact. This trip has been planned for nearly a year and although we havebeen here several times before it is a city we love and I was determined thatwe would go on with our plans as normal. This time we brought along my motherto introduce her to the sights and flavors of this wonderful city.

Some people think I was crazy to attempt a trip with thesetwo that are so dear to me. Dave has difficulty talking and absorbingconversation and mom is hard of hearing so my plan is if no one is listening Iwill just talk to myself! I am the sole driver of our rented vehicle with noGPS and neither is any good at navigation, although Dave has the edge on mom.We flew into Austinat night and drove 90 minutes in Seattle-worthy rain with windshield wipers onhyper-drive. The locals have been experiencing a drought so long that theyoung-uns have no idea what rain is so you can imagine how badly they handleddriving in a deluge. I was a bit frazzled by the time we checked in.

Dave is a history buff and he loves his cowboy history…sothis place is a gem! Bandera, a hill town outside SA, touts itself as “TheCowboy Capital of the World” but it is The Alamo in the center of the city of SA that sparks a light inDave’s eyes. (I am still flummoxed why the creators of The Alamo chose to buildit smack dab in the center of the tourist district!) It was Dave’s 3rd visit tothis small crumbling former mission made famous by its suicidal last stand in1836 and you would have thought it was his first by the excitement he showed. Hisreading and talking skills leapt a notch while there and it gave me insightinto how to implement improvement for the future.

Another upturn is the partial return of his appetite and theplethora of BBQ joints hereabouts is handy! The stroke seemed to have affectedhis taste buds and his formerly ample keenness for food had him eating like ananorexic teen. A few foods like BBQ seem to be the exception and we have takenadvantage of the region and have eaten BBQ every day since arrival. I haveteased Dave about his svelte figure now that he has dropped 30 pounds but I amrelieved I no longer have to prod him relentlessly to consume life sustainingcalories. Now if only the pounds he is losing don’t keep transferring to me!

Gleam in His Eye

2011-12-05T08:56:00.001-08:00

Humoris the foundation upon which Dave and my relationship has been built. It waswhat first attracted us when we met in 1978 and continues to help our marriagethrive. Over the years Dave could be counted on to make a wry observation orinject an amusing remark that invariably made me laugh. My wit is based more in sarcasm…Dave has agift of perception and does not fail to break me up with his keen and charminglywarped vision. His humor does not degrade, it enlightens. Those of you who knowand love Dave understand what I'm talking about.

Isay this because there has been a monolithic breakthrough this week...Dave’ssense of humor has returned! There are moments now when he casts a look my way and I see that ole' gleam in his eyes accompanied by his impish smile. I can elicit a smile more easily from him too and even a chuckle now and again. This gift approached from nowhere in the most dire hour.It came when it felt like we were standing on the edge of a cliff, but insteadof falling he took a conscious leap of faith and lifted himself to a saferplace of healing. I am so proud of him! Doing this takes grit and resolve toovercome the demons that haunt him daily. The demons named pain, disability, fatigue,depression and emasculation. He may ride this roller coaster up and down butfeeling the wind of hope in his face is a breath of fresh air.

Onenight at dinner I asked him what changed. In his halting and limited speech herelated that he was watching his good friend Steve and me working on thecomputer in an attempt to help him with a comic book matter. He made aconscious decision then and there to move past the negative aspects of his recovery. He simply said, “I was done with it!” This is another attribute of Dave’sthat I have loved and admired, his ability to cut through all the shit and geton with it. When he makes up his mind he becomes single-minded. We all like tothink we can do this, but Dave really does!

GoldenAge Comics have been Dave’s life long passion and he and Steve have built afriendship as enduring as Superman. Steve has been by Dave’s side not only as acollector, but as a man who cares so deeply about his friend’s condition thathe arranges his life around being there for Dave. Steve has been a fixture atthe speech therapy appointments and a monumental support for me. He essentiallytold me that he doesn’t give a damn if Dave spoke only gibberish the rest ofhis life; he would still be his friend. Devotion like this is to be cherished!

Steveis not alone in this commitment to Dave. So many others have come forward andcontinue to come forward to offer love, support and help. My head spins when Irecall all the acts of kindness from family and friends that have blessed us! Iwish I had the time and energy to take your hand and sincerely express mygratitude in person. For now please accept this less significant substitute:THANK YOU!!!

Cheryl and Dave circa 1980

THE GOOD, THE BAD AND THE ADORABLE

2011-11-27T14:57:00.001-08:00

Ashton and his P-Baw playing "phone"

What diversity a week canhold. A few days of hopeful improvement followed closely by days brewed in thedepths of despair. When it feels like we are doomed to misery, in steps awhirlwind of a 3 year old that zaps the household with a stiff dose ofadorable. This is how week # 9 P.S. (post stroke) is summed up.

Before the set back therewere a few days of encouraging progress. A visit from friends last Sunday hadDave participating in simple conversation and he appeared to follow most ofwhat was said. The Seahawks kicked butt that afternoon and things were movingin the right direction. Monday and Tuesday also proved fruitful with positivedevelopment in his speech therapy. He was able to say or write the correct wordfor single objects that were held up for him. This may not seem like much butbelieve me….it is HUGE! It shows me that his brain is rewiring itself andfinding ways to communicate. We will continue to concentrate on simple writtenwords and hope for progress.

The bad days began the daybefore Thanksgiving. He had been battling a head cold that got the best of him.I didn’t meddle with his need to sleep the day away for he obviously needed abreak. I hoped he would gather strength for we had been warned that holidaysare very tough for aphasics. I alsohoped it would be different in Dave’s case but it I was wrong. For the mostpart Dave masked how miserable he was but the next morning under my questioninghe confessed his desolation. What a low moment for us both! Thanksgiving usedto be his favorite holiday.

I have been receiving one ofthose educations one could live their life without…you know the kind…and thisunveiling of “The World of Aphasia” (which affects over 1 million people eachyear) is a good example. I have learned that people with aphasia cannot copewell with large groups and a Thanksgiving Day with 18 present was a recipe forfailure. This blessing in normal circumstances turned out to be the unfortunatepart. My family is large, raucous and extremely close. We are populated by whipsmart individuals with smart aleck lovability and razor sharp wit. Up until hisstroke Dave would partake in the familial wordplay and was respected as acontender. He has been blessed by their loving support for 33 years. Mysiblings have been our best friends and we have always anticipated familygatherings with enthusiasm. For Dave there is a grieving for events once sotreasured and now distressing. We are told that this will be the hardest year forthe holidays and will only improve. Assertions like this are what I hold on to!

After the abysmal day followingThanksgiving the clouds began to break with the arrival of our grandson for asleepover. The joy that children bring with their unflappable mind-set andtalent for unconditional love was the tonic this house needed! Ashton loves hissuper heroes and he defines people into 2 categories…the good guys and the badguys. He is fond of striking a dramatic pose with fisted hand raised high withthe other on jutted out hip while proclaiming in lung expanding tones “Iwill save the day!” And he did just that.

Ashton can be described as adynamo that LOVES to talk! And talk he does….from the first moment upon wakingwhen he yells for me at the top of his lungs “Graaaaannnnnnnyyyyyy!” to thelast second before dropping off at night…he exercises his own personal firstamendment with relish. He does not judge or shy away when Dave talks ingibberish to him. This does nothing to deter the little marathon talker fromcontinuing his diatribes. From thebeginning I have explained to him that P-Baw (his name for Dave) has a BIG OWIEto his brain and it makes him talk funny at times. I emphasize that it willtake a long time for his owie to go away but we must continue to help him withhis talking.

I am learning how to adjustour lives so that Dave will not be overwhelmed. He deserves to feel capable andsmart, valid and valuable to himself and others. At times it feelsinsurmountable and other times resolute. I do not know what if anything we willbe able to change or adjust come Christmas Day. Next week I just might sit onSanta’s lap and ask him for a miracle.

Rough Patch

2011-11-18T09:12:00.000-08:00

Dave showing his strut at the zoo 11-7

I try to keep my blogsuplifting despite the serious situation but sometimes it just isn’t possible. Ihaven’t written for awhile because not only have I been struggling with myhealth but Dave hit a major rough patch last weekend and all my energies havegone towards helping him recover. We have been told plenty of times that his recoverywill be a roller coaster but it doesn’t stop discouragement when things gosouth.

Sleep, or lack of it, hasbecome the greatest enemy. Plain and simple: without adequate sleep hisprogress is impeded. Directly after Dave’s stroke he began the battle of a goodnight’s rest and so far he is not winning. His restless leg syndrome, which wasmanaged before, has become ridiculously out of control. Every evening about 7his leg tremors begin to shake his recliner like a train rattling down thetracks. This continues throughout the night. We have tried new meds, acupuncture, sleeping pills, and I even boughta heating blanket for the bed but to no avail. It interrupts his sleep patternsand leaves him bleary and tired the next morning.

NUMBER ONE IMPORTANT for stroke recovery is GOODSLEEP!!!

I am hoping with time his tremors will subside but meanwhileI am open to any suggestions. This morning upon waking I even considered medicalmarijuana…hmmm…need to think seriously about this. I might be onto something!

Last weekend should have beena good one for him. My brother took him to a Husky basketball game and hissister came down from the mountains where she lives and spent the weekend. Hemoved only when he had to and his normally determined demeanor faded. Herefused to eat much and didn’t do any of his therapies. I was concerned! Manytimes he would utter “I don’t care” when I tried to motivate him. But whatscared me the most were 4 simple words: “I want to die”. Although he onlymuttered it once it showed me the depths of his despair that night. Logically Iknow that this is probably not an uncommon reaction but the anguish it elicitedin me was acute!

I decided a change of scenerywas due. On Monday morning I loaded Dave and Homer (our trusty Weiner dog) intothe car and drove up to the family sanctuary on Whidbey Island, bringing our grandson along for comic diversion. Wecranked the heat up in the condominium overlooking the beach and Dave spent agood deal of the day napping and resting while I frolicked on the beach withAshton and Homer, went to the local park and made cupcakes.

On Tuesday he seemed to havesnapped out of it and in his speech therapy that day “Kara the Magnificent”came up with a battle plan that we are enacting this week. It may take sometime to address some of the issues we outlined but it feels good to have a listto tackle! I grew up in a family of list makers so this is right up my alley! Nowthe goal is to get all of us healthy enough to focus directly on these matters.Dave came down with the head cold that is going around and I have an anchorsitting on my chest and a dry cough. What a household we make! Now if onlyHomer had opposable thumbs!

One of the activities we bothenjoyed before the stroke was playing a canasta card game called “Hand and Foot”.Over the years we have taught many people how to play this social card game. Iwas anxious to have Dave try and play this again, especially after he showed mehe is could play cribbage. Last weekend with his sister here I was dismayedwhen he refused to play. But this past Wednesday we received a visit from theDuValls, friends that we have fanatically played this game with for over 15years. He finally gave it a go and found out that he is capable of playingit!!! I am sure it eases his mind knowing he can be competent at something heloved before. This milestone will encourage him to move onward and give himreasons to stay on this path of healing and rehabilitation!!

Side by Side

2011-11-08T08:56:00.000-08:00

When I first beganblogging about Dave’s stroke I worried a bit about infringing upon his privacy.We are very different creatures and while he tends to play his cards close tohis vest, I am an open book and need to express myself often and candidly. Thedeal breaker was that people really love this man and need to know how he isprogressing. Besides….this is not his struggle alone, it is mine as well.People remind me again and again to make sure and take care of myself andwriting is one way I do this. If Icannot create pictures with paint to ease my soul then painting them with wordsmakes a good enough substitute!

In the beginning I alsowondered if anyone even read this since it is always comment free. Butapparently people are listening for now and again someone sayssomething that makes me realize it touched them in some way...allowing me peace for making our private struggle so public. I appreciate all the sincerethoughts and pure prayers sent our direction and it really lifts my spiritswhen I get emails of encouragement.

Today Dave and I are headed for the gym. It will be his first return since thestroke and I know he is not excited but I am! It will take awhile for him toget back into the rhythm of it but he will learn to love it once again (Ihope!). He already has dropped weight and is motivated to lose more. The“Stroke Diet” is not one I recommend but it seems effective so far.

We are relishing thesunny and gorgeous season. On Sunday we spent 4 hours at the zoo with ourgrandson and had a wonderful time!!! Dave did better than I expected with allthe walking. In fact I had rented a wheelchair for him to take breaks in but heinsisted upon hoofing it for the most part. Our grandson spent more time in itthan he did and it made a great carrier for my camera equipment and our lunch!

Monday he was prettytuckered out…but not enough to spank me in a game of cribbage. He skunked me by14 points! (Anyone familiar with the competitive nature of my family knows I amincapable of throwing a game!) I brought the game out not only because we usedto play it ritually but also it is darn good therapy for him. Shuffling thecards is still beyond his abilities but I had him try once each time it was histurn. Most of the time he keeps track of the addition but saying the correctwords is beyond him at the moment. I reinforce the counting but he pegged hismoves correctly EVERY SINGLE TIME! I would swat his left hand if he tried topeg with it….using his weakened right hand to peg was one of the objectives.

This week I have cometo believe Dave will make a complete or almost complete recovery, even if ittakes a year or two or more. What he has accomplished in just 6 weeks makes meso very hopeful! It has also taught me extreme lessons in patience and faithand love. Those who know me are snorting with skepticism about the “patience”part but in all seriousness, the patience I feel is profound. For the firsttime in my life I am not in a hurry to do anything. Before I would measure myday by how much I produced or accomplished. No longer is this my litmus forsuccess. Each day is to be treasured and taken with slow steps forward. I amsure this will change as Dave progresses, but it is what he needs right now andwhatever he needs is fine by me!

Acceptance

2011-11-04T15:54:00.000-07:00

This week isgoing much better than last! We have cycled through denial and anger and havecome closer to acceptance. Acceptance does NOT mean we are rolling over and takingit. What it does mean is that we are no longer in DESPAIR over our future andworking towards healing while also adjusting. “Change is good!” I proclaim witha cheesy smile!

Frustrationswill come and go but we try to learn from each one and move forward. When ittook 5 minutes for me to figure out that Dave was trying to tell me he had runout of clean underwear I got annoyed! After starting the laundry I went back tohim and explained a much quicker way for him to convey this message rather than20 questions and flat out guessing from his nonsensical words. We get mad, weget frustrated, we make adjustments and later we laugh about it!

A couple ofbig milestones this week:

Dave was released from Occupational Therapy and no longer needs outpatient appts.~ we continue to work on this area at home and I have him sewing on buttons andthreading beads….a regular sweat shop atmosphere! He also made his famoushomemade biscuits for dinner on Sunday….YUM YUM!! All these tasks require finemotor skills and I have donned the hat of therapist and devise torturousexercises for him to refine his movements.

Dave wasevaluated for driving and given the thumb’s up to get behind the wheel wheneverfeels comfortable with it. He has indicated to me that he isn’t ready justyet…but soon…and then we will approach it as if he were 15 with a freshdriver’s permit. Just for nostalgia reasons alone I intend to do all thetypical parental maneuvers like grabbing the steering wheel in panic or steppingforcefully on an imaginary brake. In all seriousness, this is a monumentalstep!!! At first we were told it could be a year before he would drive and notlong ago it was amended to 6 months. But at 5 weeks post stroke?!?!?Unbelievable!

We may befinished with outpatient Physical and Occupation therapies, but Speech therapycontinues and will most likely continue for an extended period of time. I amglad that this is the area that I find the most fascinating. When things don’tseem to go the way we would like them to I remind Dave that it could have beenso much worse and he agrees. We are thankful for that!

Anger Management

2011-10-29T10:31:00.000-07:00

We have new enemies lately. They go by the names of APATHY,BOREDOM and ANGER. Dave feels the apathy and boredom and I battle the anger. Ifanyone uses the term “New Normal” to me one more time I swear I will have tocurb a stiff punch to their face! Most of the time people saying this have nothad to deal like we have. WTF is NORMALanyhow????? I have always bucked the phrase and proclaimed that normal isboring. Which brings me to BOREDOM…..

Last weekend BOREDOM presented his bland face in our homeand did his darndest to undermine the good work done thus far. At this point inDave’s recovery he is not able to read or write much more than a word here orthere. His speaking skills are limited and difficult. Reading is a love he discovered just 4 yearspast at the time he retired from the electrical trade. To not be able to readhis beloved Western novels is a big blow to him. He cannot read the newspaperas he loved to do each morning either. With these skills still needing to besharpened he is relegated to the TV. Thank God it is football season! But ofcourse there is only so much TV that a person can take and I see him sufferingfor it. This is where APATHY seeps in and he scares me more than BOREDOM!

The past 2 days I was down with the flu and not able to helpengage him much. I was pretty much useless other than to drag my butt out ofbed to dispense medications. This morning I felt a return of energy and had Davegive Homer (the Weiner-ator!) a bath to give him something useful to do. It wentso-so (although Homer behaved as if the torture was exactly the way heremembered it). I believe Dave’s self confidence is suffering and he does notbelieve he can do much. He remembers how he did things before and the recoveryhas been difficult to the point he has said to me many times lately that he doesn’tcare. I believe he says this in frustration more than that he doesn’t care…butit frightens me all the same!

Back to the speaking and language department…..this is perhapsthe greatest hurdle Dave will have to face. We have to gird our loins for thefact that he may never have a regular ‘ole conversation again. “Kara theMagnificent” our speech therapist has been trying to make us understand thisconcept all along and I have been bull-headedly denying that he will notrecover completely. We are reliant upon the notebook I call his “talking book”and the fact that I know him so completely. Some days he says things simply andwell…others he forms words but nonsense comes out. This is all happening to aman who has the same high IQ as he always has had, who is still the same personinside as always and still has the same needs, wants, desires and sense of humor as before thestroke. So I am saying to y’all that like to whip out the phrase “New Normal”….whatexactly is NORMALabout that?!?!?!?

You can see my battle with ANGER is still being waged……

I am open to any suggestions on how to entertain and engageDave’s mind and person!

Adjustments

2011-10-23T19:44:00.000-07:00

10 days have passed since Dave's return home after his stay in rehab following his stroke. We have gone through a week of outpatient therapy that feels longer but has been fruitful. During the week he had 2 speech and 2 occupational therapies. On Thursday he met with his PT and did so well the therapist deemed it unnecessary for him to continue and we will proceed doing things at home on our own. He is taking daily walks for about 15 minutes to build his endurance and balance. Soon I hope to get him into the gym for some gentle biking.

Slowly I am beginning to feel a small glimmer of normalcy returning. Dave is back in charge of some of his past chores like retrieving the mail daily and pushing out the trash and recycle bins on pickup day. I try to include him in meal making because he is a good cook and before his stroke he had taken over most of the dinners in the past couple of years. But cutting with a sharp knife will have to wait until his fine motor skills have been more finely tuned. He will be on a blood thinning medication for life and it wouldn't do at all for him to get a cut!

We are learning how to communicate using his notebook we have filled with pictures, calendars, maps, etc. and on some days he can talk rather well. Others he gets frustrated and says "never mind" when the wrong words keep coming out. His speech therapist Kara is AWESOME!! She has driving passion for what she does and tremendous compassion for her patients. I have never missed a session and Dave's sister and good friend Steve also like to come when possible. In fact next Wed. Steve will be coming and after we plan on checking out the new Dick's in Edmonds for lunch! Most likely he will be in speech therapy for a very long time.

Dave is happy to be home but needs to get out at times. I bring him along on errands and we go to get acupuncture once or twice a week. Today I sensed he felt housebound and asked if he wanted to go for a drive. He was eager to do so and we drove down to Golden Gardens in the early evening as the sun was streaming from behind billowy clouds. Beautiful!!! We are blessed with the most amazing beaches and scenery in this city!!

Sunshine can make a difference

2011-10-17T18:44:00.000-07:00

Despite being a born 'n' raised Pacific NW'ster it is hard to get used to the "blahs" that cloudy days bring. You would think after 53 years I would be accustomed to it?!?!? Nah! But when things in life get challenging the dank days are extra tough. This morning the beams of sunshine streaming in my windows were a portent for a good day!

First thing Dave began the day writing his name and address down with his weakened right hand. This is an exercise he is supposed to perform daily and today he even impressed himself with his handwriting!
(I tease him as if he were a Bart Simpson-like character that he is required to write his name and address100 times on the chalkboard before I will feed him)
He went to his first outpatient therapy session this morning (which was OT) and performed admirably....shattering his previous records for the tasks he was asked to complete. His progress physically has been wonderful!
We both went to acupuncture after that and enjoyed a relaxing hour nap in a recliner with needles stuck in us.
After wards we swung by the local Arby's and ordered food to go and drove down to Edmonds to park overlooking the beach and ferry terminal. YUM! YUM! We love Arby's roast beef sandwiches and curly fries. They were extra good with the beautiful scenery and warm rays beating down on us!!!
We had a brand-spanking-new mattress delivered today....the hope is that it will help Dave sleep better at night. This has been a huge challenge since his stroke! I am secretly hoping his restless legs will slow down. Dave NEVER dances while awake....but let me tell you he can do a mean jitterbug while prone! It's like sleeping in an old time "magic fingers" bed only I needn't waste any quarters.
I put Dave to work helping me make my famous applesauce...well noteworthy within my family and close friends. It was good OT for him to place the apples on the corer/peeler tool I have and crank away. I just now finished spicing it up with sugar, nutmeg and extra cinnamon.....MMMMMMMM!

Bittersweet Beginnings

2011-10-15T08:35:00.000-07:00

You would think that coming home after a 19 day stay in hospital and rehab would be a joyful time. Yesterday was ROUGH! Dave came home at 10:30 in the morning and I spent the day terrified with my eyes welling up uncontrollably. I knew this journey would be an emotional roller coaster but when the downward plunge hits it is not the adrenaline rush I loved from my childhood carnival memories. Before I knew that his well being was taken care of....now the onus is on me. No matter how much I reprimanded myself or tried the stiff upper lip it all just dissolved. I know that this feeling will pass and my natural resolve will kick in. I also know this will take a ton of patience and perseverance. I suppose the "patience" part is the lesson I will be learning the most...never been my strong suit! Again I am thankful for my incredible family and the plentiful dear friends in our lives. Being responsible for a loved one 24/7 is nerve wracking but we will find our way through this one day at a time.

GOOD DAY!

2011-10-12T18:15:00.000-07:00

Today was an all around swell day!

Dave was cleared for independence within his room so he no longer has a bed or chair alarm screaming whenever he decides to get up without help (which he has stubbornly done from the get go)
He is using his right hand with more and more confidence and can write his name legibly, maybe even better than his old chicken scrawl I teasingly called "Chinese".
He can go to the bathroom in privacy
His speech is becoming clearer with the use of his "language notebook", although I am fascinated by the gibberish that spews forth from his lips I fondly call "Davish".
Good buddy Steve brought Dick's burgers for lunch and Dave was in heaven!
But best of all: DAVE IS COMING HOME ON FRIDAY!! (if you had asked me how I felt about this 2 days ago I would have burst into tears, but I feel confident now)
2 of Dave's electrician buddies came over and put up handrails and did whatever tasks I needed done in preparation for the big day.
I won a million bucks with a lottery ticket....just kidding....but I did find a dime on the ground!

The gate keepers know my car on sight with my frequent comings and goings. I am sure they will miss me and I expect Christmas cards this year from each and every one of them!

DAY 15 A.S. (After Stroke)

2011-10-11T20:06:00.000-07:00

It is hard for me to relate the changes that have happenedwith Dave and his stroke. I do know that life will be divided into “Before theStroke” and “After the Stroke”. It has had a profound impact on our lives and we willboth work hard to get as close to normal as possible. What I do know is that wecannot afford to dwell on what we can no longer do….we MUST emphasize what weCAN do.

I know it has been awhile since my last post and a few ofyou have contacted me worried that something was awry. Do not fret! Life hasjust been crazy busy and Dave is doing fine. Over the weekend I didn’t see himso much mostly because I had our grandson over for some “Granny time”. Heneeded me and I needed him.

I knew that Dave was in good hands and could use his freetime on Sunday to watch the Seahawks play what turned out to be an impressivevictory. Over the weekend he also got visits from our grandson and a few closefamily members and friends. I am still being all “Mama Bear Protective” of himas far as visitors goes. He gets so fatigued with all his therapy sessions andit is important that he gets plenty of rest so he can keep progressing. Therewill be time in the future for face to face.

That being said….he is still making improvements ~ physicallymuch faster than speech-wise. I am amazed at what he is capable of compared toa mere week ago. I am constantly reminded of how much children grow and learnand this is similar to witness. His strength in completing tasks is good andhis determination continues.

I am doing what I can to take care of myself too as so manyof you have urged me to do. Last week I made it into the gym for a couple ofworkouts and I plan to continue this week. The thought of painting still feelsremote and inaccessible. I have had lots of offers of help and things aregetting accomplished. We are so very blessed!

There is talk that Dave may be released this Friday to comehome. I have to be frank and say this makes me very nervous! I don’t feelprepared yet. He will need someone around 24/7 and will need to continueoutpatient therapy for who knows how long. I pray that I will be whatever heneeds me to be and to be strong, loving, patient and capable. A phrase that constantly slips from Dave's lips: “It is what it is”, mine has been: “Everything is going to be okay”. I believe I am trying to convince myself of this again and again.

Solving Puzzles

2011-10-06T21:30:00.000-07:00

At hospitals and rehab centers it seems there is always a jigsaw puzzle in progress in the public areas. I love puzzles and it never fails that I get seduced into fiddling around with them. Just tonight as I left Dave's room I almost made it out the main door....but the siren call of the puzzle sucked me in. You know they are similar to slot machines and getting one win that keeps you there. Once you get one piece fitted you can't seem to walk away and then you are hooked! This time I managed to pull myself away from it after just 4 pieces.

Dave has "Aphasia" which is a difficulty with language due to the stroke. He is working hard to learn to express himself each day but it will be a marathon that could go on the rest of his life. People with this disability are often tagged as stupid because they say the wrong things or even worse...their speech is garbled or nonsense. Aphasia does not affect the personality, intelligence, cognisance, nor the humor of the individual, just their ability to relate in words. Dave is the same ole smart ass as always!

Each day he is progressing with his right side physical strength. He is stronger and learning to control his muscle movements with more dexterity. He is walking to and from his room to the dining room at meal times with guidance. Balance is more of an issue here. He is going up and down stairs with guidance as well.

I may miss a OT or PT appt. now and then but it is during speech therapy that I make sure I am always present. I am very fascinated by this therapy...maybe cuz I love words and talking so much? At any rate I think of it as solving puzzles and unless I am really tired I don't mind so much.

With "Aphasiacs" it is important to talk slowly, simply and with eye contact. We also use a notepad to make sure what is said is correct since the opposite meaning can come out. Yes may be No and vice verse....so this is the most important skill he is learning right now: to say Yes or No with accuracy. As the days turn into weeks and then into months Dave will be seeing more and more of you and it is important to understand this. He is talking quite well most of the time but gets stuck at others.

I know I may be making this seem really complex and maybe even a bit scary...but really we have had plenty of laughs! Humor was one of the things that bonded us in the beginning and it will be the thing that gets us through this. I am so very proud of how hard he works at everything he does! His determination is remarkable and his attitude is admirable!!!

Thanks to all who have sent messages and cards of encouragement and support! A special thanks to the guys at Sequoyah Electric (where Dave retired from) for the gorgeous flower arrangement. We especially liked the big black spider on top!!

Easy Street

2011-10-04T20:50:00.000-07:00

Today Dave was finally moved to the rehabilitation center called "Easy Street" (and what a misnomer that is!) It should be called "Kick Ass Street"...but I am quibbling.

Since he didn't get over there until after 11 he had his 3 therapies in quick succession: Speech, Occupational and Physical. He did great in all three but I have to say that I am most fascinated with the speech aspect. This will be by far the most challenging obstacle for Dave to overcome. For instance: today before I left he kept saying to me "Pain Problem" but insisted it had nothing to do with pain. After about 10 minutes of part charades, part 20 questions and plenty of writing words in his work book and eliminating possibilities I finally cracked the code!! He wanted me to bring him 2 certain books from home!

The challenge for stroke patients with "Aphasia" like Dave has is the frustration they have when they think one word but it comes out something completely different. We try to be patient with one another and laugh when we can. It does help that I have had 33 years with this lug of a guy and we can anticipate the others thoughts and desires.

As exhausted as I am at this moment....and believe me I will be sawing logs within 5 minutes of concluding this posting.....I am exhilarated as well at how far Dave is coming. He is showing incredible fortitude of character, strong determination and positive willingness to do whatever it takes! I just LOVE this man!!!

Oh yeah....and he walked 200 feet today!!!!! Won't be long and he will be leaping tall buildings in a single bound......

G'night!

Movin' Day

2011-10-03T19:19:00.000-07:00

Today Dave was approved the transfer to the rehab facility called Easy Street...but in typical hospital fashion the wait for the doc to sign off took too long for it to happen today...so in the morn we are packing his meager belongings and going across campus. He is so ready for this!!! He woke up today, exactly one week after his stroke, saying how much better he felt and flexed his hands into fists. He is raring to get into therapy full time and kick this thing in the ass!!

I am so happy to see him like this. It gives me renewed vigor and hope. We both know it will be a long road and quite possibly may not have the perfectly happy ending....but we got each other!

Meltdown

2011-10-03T13:24:00.000-07:00

Yesterday I had my meltdown but I made sure Dave didn't suspect a thing. I suppose it was bound to happen and it was no fun at all. Each morning all week as I drove to the hospital I would give myself pep talks. I breathe deeply, relax my facial muscles and send up prayers for strength and loving patience so I can be exactly what Dave needs me to be. Until yesterday I have felt strong and able to meet the challenges. As far as Dave knows nothing was out of the norm. When I had my moments I made sure I was far from his view. When I knew it might be out of control I gathered as much control as I could muster to tell him I was headed home for a bit to let Homer out.

Once home I did what my normal routine for grief or sorrow is......I worked. I cleaned house and then headed outside to blow leaves, sweep and put away lawn furniture for the winter. It felt good to have purpose and be able to channel my pain into something productive! Later I went back to the hospital for a couple of hours and showed Dave my game face. That night as I ate dinner and confessed to Jorel my emotional day I learned an important thing: It is really difficult to chew a salad and cry. I don't recommend it!

Hotel NW Hospital ~ email sent Saturday 10-1

2011-10-02T13:20:00.000-07:00

“Welcome to the Hotel NW Hospital…..such a lovely place….such a lovely face…we’re livin’ it up at the Hotel NW Hospital…..”

It looks like Dave will be here through the weekend and “Hotel California” keeps flitting through my mind. On Thursday he was assessed by that head honcho guy I told you about and Dr. Chatilo (Russian accent and all) approved for Dave to be admitted to “Easy Street”. Now it is a matter of the insurance big wigs to give us the thumbs up. Being a weekend we reckon it will be Monday for the big moving date.

Dave continues to make great progress! He impresses his therapists every day and we are greatly encouraged. He is very involved with his care and future and asks good and pertinent questions. Little by little his talking improves and he has even teased me at times.

He is learning to dress himself and is really good at dropping his trousers ~ Just like the good ole days! What amazed me was when he tied a bow in the drawstring of his hospital britches….not just once, but twice to show off a bit. Good thing I didn’t put a timer on him though.

He is sitting up in a deluxe recliner right now watching football …..so things are just like normal in that department! Jorel’s surgery went smoothly and he has taken on the serious task of keeping Dave’s recliner at home in good working order. He also will be using Dave’s truck so it won’t get lonely. Thanks to those of you who have offered and brought food….it has been so appreciated!! FYI we are not against future offers of foodstuffs!

So many of you have offered help and I will come up with some more concrete things later when we adjust to this new life. For now one thing I would like to do is make some posters to pass on your well wishes to Dave. If you want to be a part of this you can email me a photo of yourself along with a simple message of a sentence or two. The plan is to put your words along with your picture on poster board to mount in his room where he will be in therapy. (Anyone who wants to help with this craft project is welcome to let me know!) It is possible that he will spend 3-4 weeks in rehab before coming home and having this encouragement can go far in helping him along this difficult path.

Mom is due to fly in tonight at around 5 pm and my sister Lisa and I will be waiting at her house to gently break the news. After today I am not against any public postings on FB or writing messages by airplane in the sky….whatever floats your boat!

Love to you all,

Cheryl

Improvements ~ email sent Thursday 9-29

2011-10-02T13:10:00.000-07:00

First off I need to apologize if I haven't returned your calls or texts. I am trying to do so but with Dave being so popular it is a bit beyond me right now. We both REALLY appreciate your love and support and prayers!!!

Today Dave has made improvements and I continue to praise him! He is talking a bit better than yesterday and this is one of the most encouraging things for both of us!! The frustration level has been tough with how hard it has been for him to communicate. He has been able to draw with his left hand with amazing accuracy and has performed very well with the speech therapist this morning. He was sitting up in a chair eating breakfast when I came in and was excited to see I had brought him his beloved Diet Coke :)

He got a visit from Homer today and that cheered him up. Just looking at him you wouldn't know he has suffered a stroke. His face does not droop or anything.....not Homer....Dave. Homer's ears do droop but he can't help it.

Dave is off oxygen now and got to have a shower...yay! He is learning to dress himself but needs a lot of help at this point. He was very emotional when I got here. I have been wondering if he would break down and I encouraged him to let his emotions go. It seemed to help. I have been passing on all your thoughts and good wishes and will continue to do whatever it takes to give him hope and determination to come back as much to normal as possible.

We are waiting for the head honcho from the rehab facility here at NW called "Easy Street" to come assess him for his next step in this journey. We are told he is a good candidate for this program and we are hopeful he will be accepted. The location is convenient for the family to visit and for me to support him...but of course I would go unarmed on a 3 hour rickety bus ride through Nicaraguan mudslides if that is what it takes!

FYI...Jorel's knee surgery today went well and he is resting at home. Again....feel free to share this email but Mom is still traveling and does not know this news so please do not post anything on Facebook or share with people that might divulge to her before she is home by our side.

Thank you all for your love and support and wonderful offers!!! When I have a chance to think I will be asking for help and I do appreciate it!!

Love you all! ~Cheryl

Later ~ I am home now and it is almost 8 pm. The PSE workers have been at my house for at least 2 hours and they have been concerned about our gas meter and such....you know about the gas leak that blew that house up? That was in my neighborhood and I guess they are being extra attentive to our house tonight. I don't know if that makes me feel safer or not....but they are saying we have no worries......Ahhhhhhhhh.....LIFE WITH THE KINGS!

First Days following the Stroke

2011-10-02T13:02:00.000-07:00

I am going to use this blog format to reach all the folks who care about my husband Dave. Below is the email message I sent out 2 days after he was taken to the hospital following a stroke at home. Our son Jorel is the hero of this story. He was the one who discovered Dave that morning around 10am. From what we can piece together Dave was having difficulty in bed and got dressed with intentions of going to the hospital. He made it to the living room. and collapsed partly on the couch and the floor. This is how Jorel found him. We had not idea if he would recover since he had lost his speech and the mobility of his right side.

Here is the email I sent 2 days after his stroke:

I know how much you all love and care for Dave and the past days in the hospital have been so busy and overwhelming that it is hard to put it succinctly.

The main thing he is improving...it is slow and frustrating but he is doing well. He has gone through shock, frustration, fatigue and many more emotions. It is normal for stroke patients to feel depression and be very emotional. He is battling feeling stupid right now but inside his head he is still the same guy. He has what is called "Aphasia" where he has difficulty understanding and speaking language. The blood clot affected the left side of the brain and the speech center. Therefore his right side went from paralyzed on Monday to weak today. But he actually stood up and took steps assisted today!!! We are hopeful he will be able to overcome these disabilities and live a normal life...but we are taking it day by day.

He is working with Speech, Occupational and Physical therapists each day as well as seeing doctors. Most likely he will be here 3-4 days and then transferred to a care facility in order to be trained to come home. We are hopeful for enough of a recovery that this will happen!

I know all of you love Dave and are very concerned....many of you have asked to visit. Dave appreciates all your messages but at this time he asked that he not get visitors. He is so busy and gets too little time in between things to rest.

Many of you have asked what you can do. First off you can pray! One thing we could use help with is home meals. Jorel is going in for knee surgery tomorrow and I will be at the hospital so much I do not want Jorel to be neglected in any way. We don't need a lot....just a few simple easy meals that Jorel can get for himself. His surgery is minor and it won't be too long before he is back in action.

Some of you have asked if it is okay to let others know....yes it is with the caveat that my mother not be told just yet (that means that if you pass this on it must be underlined!!) She is completing a fabulous 3 week trip back east with 3 girlfriends and will be home this Sat. the 1st. She will be informed then when she is not so far away.

Thanks for all your love and kindness!!

Cheryl

SHOCKING News

2011-10-02T12:13:00.000-07:00

I thought last summer was a nightmare....as it turns out it was only a bad dream. On September 26th the real nightmare began...but we will wake up!

First off I need to explain our summer. My husband Dave and I have known a young woman (who will go unnamed) since she was 11. We were her legal guardians when she was 13, 14 and 15 and have done our best over the years to be a positive influence in her very tragic life. She is now a 24 year old single mother of a 3 year old whom we have loved and cared for as if he were a blood Grandson. We adore this boy and would do anything for him! Because of this boy we took her in on July 1st. What we didn't know is that she is a heroin addict and the missing $ from our wallets along with the credit card fraud was her doing. In late Aug. we discovered that she stolen and pawned thousands of dollars worth of my jewelry during the summer. On August 31st we confronted her, called the police and kicked her out. We were instrumental in getting our grandson out of her dangerous life and he is currently living with his birth father. We thought we were going to get our lives back...

Fast forward to Monday, September 26th

I was in Winthrop that rainy on Day 2 of a 4 day retreat with my artist buddies. Verizon was down in the area and I had turned my phone off. About 3:30 I clicked on Facebook and saw this posting from a friend:

"Now I know why Beau suddenly jumped straight up while asleep on my arm this morning at 6 am. Apparently a house blew up about 1/2 mile away - gas explosion. He heard it but I didn't."

I sarcastically commented to my friends that my house was about a half mile from his. Seeing a message I clicked on it and this is what I read:

Call me ASAP.....EMERGENCY....
Call me ASAP .....

Talk about feeling terror! My mind took a leap that it was MY HOUSE that had blown up! I have seen it happen on film but my entire body was shaking while I tried to call someone at home. After several mis-dials I finally reached my sister and while I was relieved to know that my house along with my husband, son and dog had not gone up in a natural gas fireball, the grim news that my husband had suffered a stroke early that morning added a new dimension of shock.

I could not have been with better people upon receiving this news. Liana Bennett immediately offered to drive me the 4 + hours back to Seattle and the others, Pepper Peterson, Patty Forte Linna and Joanne Shellan all were game to go along or do whatever it took to get me safely to my husband's side.

As it turned out Liana and Pepper took me to Marblemount where my brother-in-law met us and took me the remainder of the way. Arriving around 9pm I met a surreal group of family gathered around my husband at NW Hospital in north Seattle. Those of you who have experienced something similar....it takes a special attitude to face this kind of tragedy with fortitude. I can't say I was successful but I think I did okay.

Jan Endsley ~ The Crazy Quail Lady

2011-08-12T09:56:00.000-07:00

I love it when people have passion…when something drives them with fierce devotion. Jan is one of these people and her passion is not ordinary: QUAILS!

She has dedicated her life to these birds (and other fowl) and single-handedly operates Covey Run Game Farm in Eatonville WA. I visited Jan in July and before painting her FACE we toured her little slice of heaven that is tucked up at the foot of Mt Rainier. Besides a plethora of quail she has chickens, hens, pheasant and even a peacock. 2 dogs, a cat and a horse round out her menagerie.

There may be surplus of birds but the quail rule the roost where Jan hand raises chicks and special ones live in the house, share ice cream and go camping with her. Her home is adorned with bird and especially quail art and paraphernalia. In 2003 Jan penned a charming book of vignettes told from a quail’s perspective titled “Diary of a California Valley Quail”.

Louis is “King Quail” in her poultry domain and Jan commissioned me to paint a portrait of Mr. Louis to immortalize his unique personage. In fact it was Louis that was responsible for us meeting. He was the live model for wildlife sculptor Rip Caswell in Edmonds at Cole Gallery one Saturday in June. I was surprised to find he didn’t have a feather on his head, what we all come to equate with quail, and learned that Louis is a Bobwhite quail. An entire world beyond my awareness unfolded that day!

When Jan posed for her FACE portrait this week we had Louis sit on her lap. All was cool for the first shots and then I watched as he geared himself up for a flap to freedom. I loved the way this last shot turned out when Louis launched himself off Jan's lap. Not to worry....Jan scooped him up in no time!

Choochokum Arts Festival

2011-07-14T08:09:00.000-07:00

Henry Stinson and his fresh-off-the-easel portrait of me

I did my very first arts festival last weekend and had a blast! Langley is a charming village perched up high over Puget Sound on south Whidbey Island and the weekend was spectacular! A friend invited me to join a group of artists called Langley Artists Connect who were painting from life and I thought it would be a great experience to paint my FACEs here. I was not disappointed! On Saturday morning I set my easel up with purpose next to Henry Stinson who is Nationally known as a painter and instructor. I wanted to soak up what I could from a seasoned professional and I even sat for my own portrait by Henry first thing Sunday morning.

Painting portraits in this kind of setting is a crash course of intensity and how to paint under pressure. I spent about an hour on each portrait which is way less time that I typically spend, forcing me to look closely and paint what is important to that person right from the get go. I loved each and every person but I did have a couple of favorites! Connie was visiting from California and was my first customer and her sunny personality was a beam of joy for me. Two days later she was cracking crab on the deck of the friends she was visiting and I snapped the pose seen below.

"The Chronic Crab Cracker"

Near the end of the festival I met a young college grad named Katie who volunteered for a character I was inspired to create. I had been eyeing the "Honey Buckets" placed at the far end of the bank parking lot we were painting in and wanted to utilize the chance to photograph a FACE coming out of one of them. In my quest to chronicle everyday common situations it just doesn't get more common than that!

Katie told me her parent’s home was just a block away and within a closet hung a prom dress from 4 years back just itching to be donned for our purpose.
Seize the Moment I say!! So we did!
Katie posed ….I painted….we laughed….and I followed to her house where she transformed herself into Cinderella....or more appropriately..."The Portable Prom Date".
Her dad came along with us on our outlandish mission to the nearest Honey Bucket.

I hope he knows I am in full ownership of all my marbles….even if I have misplaced one or two temporarily!!

"The Portable Prom Date"

Katie and I at the end of the festival

The Shotgun Anniversary

2011-06-14T19:50:00.000-07:00

Few people embody the true spirit of individualism and diversity like this unlikely couple. One comes from Florida, the other from the Pacific NW…their ages, background and races are completely opposite but the sincere devotion they share is without equal!

These two are fabulous people with sincere and warm hearts. Ruby is FLAMBOYANT and loves to wrap her head in brightly colored fabrics, armor her wrists with layers of bracelets and drape enough necklaces for 10 ladies around her neck. She says that quite often strangers will ask her what African country she is from. With a light-hearted chuckle she chooses to get a kick out of this response rather than take offense!

Seen from behind, Lowell’s long gray hair reveals dread locks and the full beard in front along with the festive hats he likes to wear often give people the idea he is caught in a 1960’s time warp. Again….they laugh about the response the pair of them inspire! I get the biggest kick out of seeing them drive up in their sporty little convertible, top down and the back seat commandeered by their 100+ lb. black German Shepherd. What a sight!

This summer Ruby and Lowell will celebrate their 35th wedding anniversary. Several times through out the history of their love affair they have posed for those old time saloon scenes of bygone days. So to commemorate their special milestone they came to me wanting to keep the tradition alive but with a twist. You can see the result!

The Guitar Hero Graduate

2011-06-14T08:56:00.000-07:00

Family and achievers are the theme this month or so it seems. Brandon is my nephew who has been living with us temporarily while he gets started in his career in the city after graduating college a year ago. I came up with his character because it is a subject often discussed among parents how boys are so different than girls and video games are the favorite culprit. Many times boys pursue these games with fervor and obsession, in some cases to the detriment of their academic pursuits. With Brandon the truth wasn’t so simple. He graduated valedictorian of his high school class of 6 but proved that he had the chops at university by making the dean’s list all but one quarter of his college career. After getting his degree last spring he did what so many other young graduates are struggling with in this tough economic climate ~ he landed a job! Yet he can still play those games like a pro….

The Type "A" Angler

2011-06-14T08:30:00.000-07:00

John is my big brother and we are the first born in a family of 5. We were each other’s best friend from the get go and remain close today. Coming from a family of high achievers and extremely competitive athletes made for some very interesting family dynamics! My siblings and I tease John with the nickname “Golden Boy” sarcastically delivered with affection and pride. From a very young age he applied himself to his studies and career with a single-minded purpose that paid off with an early retirement that now allows him to pursue his chief passions: fly fishing and golf. I often assure my “victims” that the characters I choose for them are not meant as definitions of who they are. Usually there is some element of them the photo but it is meant tongue-in-cheek. With John’s personae, it is entirely TRUE!

Oops! Forgot these pics

2011-06-08T08:59:00.000-07:00

These are the two portraits that go along with my last post

A Youthful pair of FACEs

2011-06-08T08:54:00.000-07:00

Painting children as part of my project poses plenty

of challenges...chiefly that they do not sit still for the portrait

forcing me to use a photograph.

Conversely this gives me a chance to paint unusual

facial expressions not easily held in person for long.

I took advantage of this with my niece Dain.

As a child I was an rabid Tomboy with one exception....

I LOVED BARBIE DOLLS!! still do :)

Dain is a girl after my heart with her plethora of Barbies.

Most of them have been given to her as hand me downs or gifts

and believe me...she plays with each and every one!

So it was with nostalgic delight that we set up her

photo by transferring a trunk load of Barbies onto her back patio.

My Grandson also came along that day for his photo.

I had envisioned him holding some cotton candy in one hand

but was disappointed to find that it no longer comes on a cone...only in a bag.

(What?!?! Some things should not be messed with!!)

He was chomping at the bit to play with that Barbie car

so when I called it a wrap he wasted no time

and soon Barbie and Ken were cruisin' in style!

The Decadent Debutante

2011-06-04T09:02:00.000-07:00

Last night I returned from my first ever trip to New Orleans, a city that I have been fascinated with ever since I read my first Anne Rice novel. I loved it! I packed my paints for this trip as I had a session lined up with my friend Holly, who moved there with her husband the year after Katrina. I have known Holly since she was 17 and now….many years later she still exudes a freshness of youth and this is no easy feat in 100 degree heat! Her youthful vitality along with being in a Southern City is why Debutante came to mind.

My husband and I stayed at a place on St. Charles Ave. and we loved our rooms! We could watch the historic streetcars zipping up and down the Ave. and envision the spectacle of the Mardi Gras and Carnival parades from the balcony. Many trees, fences and street wires were still festooned with beads from the most recent parade season. I scouted the perfect location for our photo on one of my morning walks along this route…a decrepit and decayed home of former grandeur that now houses several apartments.

As we set up to take the photo the door opened and a surly looking man emerged. He eyed us with suspicion and barely grunted a reply when I explained our presence. He shuffled across the sagging weather-beaten floorboards and ensconced himself on the creaking porch swing, promptly lighting up a morning cigar. I had to stifle a laugh since his presence in the background added the perfect touch! I was only sorry that the lighting was not right at that particular moment and we had to return a couple hours later. He was of course gone by then but the light was right and this is the result.

The Off-Kilter K-9 Cop

2011-05-14T12:00:00.000-07:00

Dawn and I were BFFs in high school where we played on both the volleyball and basketball teams. 33 years ago she even introduced me to my husband (yet I promised not to hold that against her :)) Dawn went on to a career in law enforcement and her last gig had her in my hometown so every once in awhile Dawn would stop by for a quick visit. Many times it gave my neighbors pause to see a police car parked outside my house for a stretch of time.

When I was conspiring with Dawn about the character for her photo I wanted something quirky and outside the box of what the public views as a typical testosterone driven police officer. Since we both revere dogs I thought it should include a K-9 dog but all I had available was Homer, my trusty and ever tolerant Dachshund. Then the idea took full bloom. Why not use Homer? I sewed a vest for him and painted K-9 on the sides. One day during her shift Dawn stopped by. Much to his chagrin we strapped Homer into his vest and plopped him onto the hood of her cop car for her photo op.

I often wonder what goes through the mind of the casual passer-by who happens upon me posing my FACE victims! I do know that we almost caused an accident one time when I was posing a punked-out cutie in short skirt and bustier. Tires screeching and horns honking caused us to just about jump out of our skins! We did have a good chuckle over it later on.

The Perpetual Passenger (by Profession)

2011-05-06T18:51:00.000-07:00

Mark was my very first pick-up-in-a-bar addition to my FACE project and it was his dancing that drew my attention. He was among a group of 10 swing dancers lighting up the night at a local blues show. I almost didn’t go that night but I left with my face hurting from all the smiling and laughing. I hold his group responsible for this!

I credit Mark with giving me even more insight into my motivations for furthering my study of people. After finishing his FACE another layer revealed itself. As humans we tend to compartmentalize strangers by assessing their physical appearance and making snap judgments on their character. Quite often nothing is a simple as it looks…the truth is far more complex!

At first glance most people would not guess that Mark is a recent college graduate that comes from a highly educated family with a father who is a university professor. His abundant dreads wrapped up in a bandana give him the aspect of a bohemian. Stereotyping can be dangerous and it came to me that one of the things I can do with this project is to de-bunk stereotypes.

Mark also belongs to a close knit community of dancers and made a decision upon graduation not to immediately enter into the corporate rat race. Instead he is following his heart and traveling the country. Often it means following his dance muse and going where the dance community welcomes him.

When I choose someone to paint it is usually because I am interested in who they are as a person…they pique my curiosity and while I paint we chat and I get to know them. This enters into my painting and helps me interpret their character. One thing I noticed about Mark was his endearing sideways smirk and wanting to capture this expression I asked if he would hold that smile a few times during the session. He obliged and commented later that it was easy to smile like that…all he had to do was think of his girlfriend!

Mark was in town only for a small window of time and is on the road now. It brings a smile to my face to know he is out there on a grand adventure!

Billy Stapleton ~ Blues Guitarist and "The Curator of Cool"

2011-04-20T08:13:00.000-07:00

I met Billy when I went to watch the band "Little Bill and the Blue Notes" play. I had just recently finished a painting of Little Bill and Billy is the guitarist in this vastly entertaining group. After the wonderful show that night I enthusiastically asked if he would sit for a portrait and he graciously agreed.

We really didn’t have a concept ahead of time of what character we would have for his photo op but as we talked it became clear that guitars would have to be a part of it. Billy is an avid guitar aficionado and has AMAZING skills! He gave me quite the education in this department and I enjoyed listening to his life story. It became clear that this guy is the definition of cool, thus leading me the title for his photo, "The Curator of Cool".

Billy was born and raised in the San Francisco area and came of age in the 1960’s. His first instrument was an accordion which he began lessons on at age 7 but he quickly moved onto guitar. As a teen he worked in a music store and belonged to the typical boyhood bands. This gave him plenty of exposure to the emerging music scene of the times. He frequented all the local concerts bringing him into contact with a vast array of bands and personalities many of which became legends.

Billy regaled me with fascinating stories of rubbing elbows with the likes of Eric Clapton and Jimi Hendrix. I was particularly smitten with the story he told of getting backstage with a $10 bribe to see Jimi. Once there he was star struck and couldn’t move from the doorway into the room. Jimi noticed and grabbed a coke and brought it to Billy with hand outstretched in welcome. Billy was certain that nothing but garbled noise escaped his mouth!

Billy’s website is chock full of fascinating stories and information. Check out his Guitar Stories for sure! Little Bill and the Bluenotes, the band he is part of, was just honored with the Washington Blues Society’s “Best Traditional Blues Band” award and a schedule of their gigs is listed here. If you live in the Puget Sound region you gotta go see ‘em!

Back to School

2011-04-17T08:52:00.000-07:00

Ever short on inspiration or need a boost of energy?

Just visit a school classroom and you’ll find it in surplus! Last week I visited a 6^th grade class where my sister Lisa teaches and I went away not only motivated, but also impressed on so many levels. It never ceases to amaze me what teachers accomplish on a daily basis with society’s most precious commodity…our children. And it is these children that give me the most hope, joy, renewal, inspiration and sense of commitment.

My original intent was to take a photo of Lisa with the portrait I had recently finished of her. For varieties sake and because it is so much a part of who she is I thought it would be fun to put her in a classroom setting. From there the plan evolved into a lesson in my FACE art for the kids. They had recently learned about caricatures and had even drawn some of their own so this was a natural segue.

I brought my easel and a drawing of a FACE of my niece (Lisa’s daughter) to do a quick demonstration on. I explained my concept and process and after the demo we passed out FACE paintings for each child to hold in a group photo. This is where they had the most fun of course! Choosing a FACE and then pretending to be this person was a wee bit like Halloween I suppose. Although they couldn’t see the results until I sent the picture to my sister later that day.

For me it was refreshing to witness that art is still alive (at least at this particular school). The kids were amazing, smart, polite and very respectful in handling my portraits. Art is not just for the artist alone or for one client that happens to pony up the currency to purchase a painting; it is meant to be shared and interacted with. To all you artists out there….contact a school nearby and share your talents with the kids.

It will revitalize your spirit and encourage you on this journey we are all taking together!

Little Bill Engelhart ~ Jazz and Blues Legend

2011-03-18T19:06:00.000-07:00

Sometimes I have to stop and pinch myself I have so much fun in this business of art! Especially since starting my FACE project last July. To date I have painted 50 portraits which I call FACEs. (read about it more here) Recently I met and painted a man who turns out to be a Pacific NW legend in jazz and blues, Little Bill Englehart. For 3 years I have been sweating it out in aerobics class with his wife Jan and had not a clue until a few weeks ago who Bill was. I guess I really don't mind being clueless in this way...it makes for happy surprises and no prejudgment along the way. My time spent painting Little Bill was delightful! He told me stories of his life and I slathered paint!

Last weekend my husband and I took some friends to hear Bill perform with his band Little Bill and the Bluenotes and my life got even better! Without this project I would not have met so many wonderful people and I would have missed out on the privilege of knowing Little Bill and experiencing firsthand his astounding talent, gentle nature, vast story-telling skills and generosity. And his wife Jan is such a dear person who has the energy and spirit of a young girl!

Every painting is a self portrait

2011-03-10T12:06:00.000-08:00

"The greatest tool an artist can use is their emotion!" This is the strongest lesson I brought home from St. Petersburg Russian after a 4 week study trip in 2006. Everything we feel is channeled from our souls and out the end of the paintbrush. We cannot avoid it even if we tried!

“EVERY PAINTING IS A SELF PORTRAIT”

I don't know who to credit this saying to but I have heard it plenty of times in my artistic career and whether one is painting a still life, landscape, animal or figure it rings true! Over the past couple of years I have tested the notion to it fullest and now that I am healing from the pain and incapacity I have suffered I can see it more clearly.

The work I produced in the midst of my pain reflected the inward struggles I faced. For the most part the color was a bit dead, the compositions were off and the values wavered in the middle range. Not every painting came off poorly during this time but I now refer to it as my own personal "Dark Ages". Now I am hoping that history repeats itself and I can enjoy a personal Renaissance!

Recently I was lamenting this period to a new artist friend and she gave me a complete new perspective. She said it was good fortune that I had an outlet for my frustrations and pain. If I did not paint my issues out then they would have bottled up even more. So…I am thankful for my art in a whole new manner and will continue to paint “self portraits” with even more passion and freedom!

Dogs Rock my World!

2011-01-28T08:51:00.000-08:00

I adore dogs! I cannot remember a day in my life where a dog has not been in my household. I can be in the most foul of moods and catch a glimpse of a dog blissfully jutting his head out a car window and my temper is instantly lifted. It is like my insides smile! So being a pet artist among other things is a treat for me and one of the perks is spending time with a dog and taking reference photos for a portrait. The other day I met Gwen and her dog Coltrane at Greenlake in North Seattle for a session.

First off Greenlake is one of my VERY favorite haunts in Seattle. My mother and father met at 11 years old as neighbors a block from the lake and one of my grandmothers continued to live there into the early 1990's....so I have spent many a day there since birth. Best of all Greenlake is a doggy haven with a large percentage of walkers and joggers umbilically linked in exercise harmony.

Gwen is a professional dog walker who walks this beat with her charges Monday thru Friday and creates quite the stir. This particular day she had a dozen dogs in tow and at the end of the 3 mile loop it was Coltrane’s moment of paparazzi glory. With the other dogs safely tucked inside the truck Coltrane had his moment in the spotlight and we posed him in the warm afternoon light just off the path about 12 feet from the lake’s edge. He tolerated our commands initially but suddenly he bolted for the lake! Despite our calls of STOP and COME he was having none of it. He was thirsty after his trot around the lake and he had decided it was time for a drink!

Now these are the moments I live for! I tell my clients that we can have all sorts of ideas about how the dog should pose but it is essentially up to the beasts themselves. I give the dog latitude and they ultimately tell me how they want to be portrayed. Coltrane had a heyday in the shallows of Greenlake! He slurped and sloshed and romped and grinned his goofy delight at us. He was in HIS element and we were the lucky spectators. And I was the lucky recipient of his canine joy and over 100 shots of a gorgeous Golden Retriever!

Nostalgia

2011-01-08T16:03:00.000-08:00

This year for Christmas some dear friends gave me a fabulous gift...the board game "Masterpiece: The Art Auction Game" which they have searched garage sales for 2 years before scoring a hit. My parents gave the very same game to me in 1970 the year it debuted. Even though I couldn't get any of my 4 siblings interested in playing it, I poured over the 24 color reproduced cards depicting historically grand paintings and became completely enchanted! Today I can still vividly recall how impressed I was! The full color reproductions from El Greco to Edward Hopper planted a sense of art history in my young little brain. I marveled over the differing styles, compositions and colors, not realizing the future impact this would generate. Leafing through them today I am struck by one thing in particular....Mary Cassatt was the only female artist represented. We've come a long way baby!! BTW....last week the 4 of us played the game and had a lot of fun bidding and buying masterpieces. My husband collected the most in value, but overall I think I am the winner!

The Importance of Camaraderie

2010-12-12T09:03:00.000-08:00

We artists can be a quirky and strange breed....most of us are aware of this! Often we march to a different drummer and pay unusual heed to the dictates of society. We spend inordinate amounts of time alone creating art and speculating upon the visions percolating inside our brains. That is why being a part of an artist's group is so essential: it is a safe place for us to carry on with our antics with like minded individuals who understand...or at least pretend to!

My group...Washington Artists Group (or as we like to call ourselves....WAG) have been banding together since 2007 and we all agree our time together is often the highlight of our month. The WAGs meet the first Wednesday of each month over a potluck meal, bringing our quick wits along with our recent paintings for critique. Really we are just a bunch of smart mouthed jokers that love art talk and a good time but it is priceless!

Last week we had our 4th Christmas party together at the grand home of member Judythe Sherwood and gathered for a group photo. This year was special in that we also celebrated the induction of our guru, Ned Mueller, as a Master of Oil Painters of America....a prestigious and well deserved honor! We are fortunate to have Ned and each other!

Standing in photo: Liana Bennett, Ned Mueller, me, Mark Boyle, Pepper Peterson, Dick Smith
Seated: Patty Forte Linna, Joanne Shellan, Judythe Sherwood

SEIZING OPPORTUNITY

2010-12-02T18:59:00.000-08:00

I think I may be a serial opportunist. Ya know....I think you have to be that way in a creative industry! Today I visited my husband Dave at the hospital where he is recuperating from knee replacement surgery and I brought my camera and props along. As callous as it sounds I realized earlier today that I have a golden opportunity for a photo op with Dave being hospitalized. You see I have been painting these portraits of heads that I call FACEs and posing people with the portrait replacing their real heads. My mind has been astir with so many possibilities that represent life in general. Being confined to a hospital bed fits right into this category! He has been in there for 3 days now and will be coming home tomorrow so I realized that if I didn't get a picture taken today I may be out of luck. Thank God I married a good sport! Despite his obvious pain he allowed me to pose him in several shots holding up a portrait in place of his face. Even though the FACE in the painting is not his (it belongs to his closest boyhood chum) I'll bet he had about the same expression on his face behind the board! Here are 3 pictures I took today, one of which will be named "The Impatient Patient". Which one do you like best? Tomorrow I bring him home and who knows what indignities I will come up with by then!

ART AS THERAPY

2010-11-30T14:36:00.000-08:00

I was doing the avoidance thing today…you know what I am talking about…avoiding thinking about something stressful or hurtful. I took my husband to the hospital this morning for his second knee replacement surgery this year and I was still hurting emotionally from a tough issue with a dear one the day before…so I had plenty on my mind! I dodge these feelings by confronting my easel and JUST PAINTING! Standing in front of my easel wielding paint-slathered brushes and swiping them across the canvas has proven the best remedy! I am forced to put my mind to the task and forget to roll my troubles around inside my head. During the physical process of painting I have a multitude of decisions to make and these consume my thoughts: Is the drawing correct? Do I make this warmer or cooler? Is this mixture of paint in harmony with the rest? Should I lose this line or make it sharp? Does this area need to be darker, or does that one need to be lighter? Should I take a break and have a drink? Well….taking a break is useful cuz walking back into my studio and seeing the painting afresh is good critique. As for having that drink…is it 5 o’clock yet?!

First Snow in Seattle

2010-11-22T10:59:00.000-08:00

Today was our first real snow of the season and I love it! Last year we had nothing to lay claim to and the winter doldrums were all the worse for it. There isn't much on the ground but enough to gloss over the world for a moment in time. I skipped the gym this morning and took Homer, my trusty Wiener Dog, down to the local park to savor the snow. What I love about this particular park are the 2 ponds, or bogs really, that are separated by a trail and surrounded by natural woods on one side. There are beautiful in so many seasons, but today they were special! The snow gave even the blackberry brambles a delicate loveliness. Snow can be the same as light is to artists....glazing objects in a splendor that normally does not appeal. Even a pile of trash can look attractive dusted with snow! Homer and I relished our stroll between the ponds and through the trail in the woods in a full circle back home, taking the time to breathe deeply in the brisk air and observe the distinctive charm of the snow’s caress!

Once home you can see by the photo that Homer showed the results of his snowy trek. See the snowballs that cling to his feet? If he wasn’t wearing this sweater then his entire chest and underside would be festooned like a decorated Christmas tree…seriously! It would take a bit of defrosting before he was allowed inside. So forcing him to don a silly sweater is not a fashion statement at all…just a practicality. Sorry Homer!

R.I.P. Baby!

2010-11-12T18:18:00.000-08:00

I had a phone call this week from a friend....not a call you want to get, but one that inevitably comes. She had to put her French Mastiff down last Saturday and she was very torn up over it. Baby was her pride and joy....a big huge galoot with a heart as large as his robust body! He battled a few health issues from puppyhood but despite it all he was jubilant, always game for a walk or romp....a prime example of what mind or matter truly means! Having plied my trade as a pet portraitist for the past dozen years I have felt these losses all too often....once hearing of a dog's passing while I was in the process of painting the portrait. That one was tough! They are my occupational hazards in this otherwise pleasurable gig. Baby....I was lucky to know you and even more honored to paint your portrait...not just once...but twice!

FIRST EVER BLOG

2010-11-09T11:28:00.000-08:00

For some time now I have been told....YOU SHOULD BLOG! I have resisted because we all have plenty of things that take our time up...why add more? Well I have finally succumbed to the craze and I will tell you why: I finally feel like I have a reason to blog. What began as a simple goal to paint more from life has turned into a full-on project which I have dubbed my "FACEs Project". I have people sit for 90 minutes to 2 hours tops for quick, energetic portraits and then have them hold the painting in place of their face for a quirky photo. These are all done on 12x12 inch surfaces. This entire exercise has taken on a life of its own and I am having a BLAST! Not only do I get life experience with my art but I also get to visit with people in what is otherwise a very lonely job. And my models tell me what fun it is to have their portrait done. The wins just keep on coming! I have even begun to form a BIG, HUGE AMBITIOUS GOAL in relation to this project that I will spend the next year training, planning and preparing for. More later on that....